DeepSummary
In this podcast episode, Matt Abrahams interviews Charles Duhigg, author of the book "Super Communicators," about the techniques that distinguish exceptional communicators. They discuss the neuroscience behind successful communication, emphasizing the importance of neural entrainment, storytelling, and empathy in fostering connection and understanding.
Duhigg explains the three types of conversations (practical, emotional, and social) and the necessity of aligning conversation types for effective communication. He also shares insights into the habits of super communicators, including deep listening, asking deep questions, and demonstrating vulnerability.
The conversation also covers strategies for navigating conflictual conversations, such as looping for understanding, managing control dynamics, and setting boundaries. Additionally, they explore the challenges and strategies for communicating effectively in online and virtual settings.
Key Episodes Takeaways
- The ability to establish neural entrainment, or the synchronization of brain patterns, is crucial for effective communication and fostering genuine understanding.
- Storytelling and the use of vivid imagery and emotions are powerful tools for engaging audiences and facilitating connection.
- Aligning conversation types (practical, emotional, and social) is essential for successful communication and avoiding breakdowns in understanding.
- Super communicators practice habits such as deep listening, asking deep questions, demonstrating vulnerability, and slowing down to be present in the moment.
- Navigating conflictual conversations effectively involves active listening, looping for understanding, managing control dynamics, and setting boundaries.
- Communicating effectively in online and virtual settings requires an awareness of the constraints and advantages of different communication channels and adapting one's approach accordingly.
- Developing the habit of asking questions, particularly deep questions that invite others to share their experiences and perspectives, can significantly enhance communication and connection.
- Effective communication is not solely about charisma or intelligence, but rather the ability to make others feel comfortable, heard, and understood.
Top Episodes Quotes
- “The goal of communication is to make that connection, to start thinking alike, which doesn't mean we have to agree with each other. It just means that we understand each other.“ by Charles Duhigg
- “Oftentimes, when a breakdown occurs in a conflict conversation due to one of two things and possibly both, the first is that the people involved do not believe that the other person is actually listening.“ by Charles Duhigg
- “The more that we just get ourselves to slow down just in just half a second, the more we can actually communicate through that channel.“ by Charles Duhigg
- “Asking a question gives us a chance to let the other person do something they love. Asking a deep question is even better because it gives me a chance to learn about who you are and for you to remember this moment that was important to you.“ by Charles Duhigg
Entities
Person
Organization
Book
Publication
Episode Information
Think Fast, Talk Smart: Communication Techniques
Stanford GSB
3/12/24
The ways supercommunicators operate and how to emulate their techniques.
Across more than 130 episodes, Think Fast, Talk Smart has touched a lot on what it takes to be a good communicator. But what about reaching that next level? What about being a “supercommunicator”? Supercommunicator is a term used by Pulitzer Prize winning journalist and author Charles Duhigg in his latest book, Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection.Â
In this podcast episode, Abrahams and Duhigg explore the precise techniques that distinguish a good communicator from a “supercommunicator:” traits such as active listening; looping for understanding to demonstrate genuine engagement; and identifying what someone is truly feeling, underneath what they actually say.
Episode Reference Links:
- Charles Duhigg: Website
- Charles Duhigg: Books
- Duhigg’s New Yorker article
- Thalia Wheatley’s research study: The Repurposed Social BrainÂ
- Nicholas Epley’s research paper: Overly Shallow?: Miscalibrated Expectations Create a Barrier to Deeper Conversation
- Alison Wood Brooks’ research paper: The Conversational Circumplex: Identifying, Prioritizing, and Pursuing Informational and Relational Motives in Conversation
- Michael Yeomans’ research paper: It Helps to Ask: The Cumulative Benefits of Asking Follow-Up Questions
- Sheila Heen’s research project: Harvard Negotiation Project
- Ep.92 - No Regrets: How to Take Risks: YouTube / WebsiteÂ
- Ep.82 - It’s Not About You: Why Effective Communicators Put Others First: YouTube / WebsiteÂ
- Ep.103 - Simple is a Superpower: How to Communicate Any Idea to an Audience: YouTube /Â Website
Connect:
- Email Questions & Feedback >>> thinkfast@stanford.edu
- Episode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart Website
- Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.io
- Think Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn Page,  Instagram, YouTube
- Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn
- Stanford GSB >>> LinkedIn & Twitter
Chapters:
(00:00:00) Introduction
Host Matt Abrahams introduces guest Charles Duhigg and his new book Super Communicators.
(00:01:26) Transition from Habits to Communication
Duhigg shares how personal experiences and a desire to understand human interactions motivated him to explore communication.
(00:02:51) The Neuroscience of ConnectionÂ
The neuroscience behind successful communication and the role of neural entrainment in establishing connection and understanding.
(00:04:21) Storytelling as a Powerful Communication Tool
The importance of storytelling in communication and how stories foster empathy and engagement.
(00:06:16) Identifying and Aligning Conversation TypesÂ
Three types of conversations (practical, emotional, social) and the necessity of aligning conversation types for effective communication.
(00:08:07) Practices of Super CommunicatorsÂ
Insights into the habits of super communicators, including their approach to recognizing conversation types and the importance of deep listening.
(00:15:02) Navigating Conflict Through Effective CommunicationÂ
Managing conflictual conversations with a focus on listening, understanding, and managing control dynamics.
(00:20:50) Challenges of Online CommunicationÂ
Challenges and strategies for communicating in online and virtual settings.
(00:25:04) The Craft and Impact of Storytelling
Approaches to storytelling and its significance in making complex ideas memorable and engaging.
(00:29:06) Developing New Communication HabitsÂ
New communication habits developed from Duhigg's research and their impact on personal and professional interactions.
(00:31:02) The Final Three Questions
Charles Duhigg discusses the importance of deep questions, the communicator he most admires, and his recipe for successful communication.
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