DeepSummary
In this episode, Sarah Kosterlitz interviews psychotherapist and author Kelli Miller about common relationship issues covered in Miller's book 'Love Hacks'. They discuss what to do when you don't feel in love with your partner anymore, and how to reignite that passionate love through techniques like writing love letters and doing exciting activities together. They also talk about the impact of social media on relationships and setting boundaries around its use.
Another key issue discussed is navigating situations where partners want different things in the relationship, such as one wanting to be a stay-at-home parent while the other wants to continue working. Kelli provides advice on using an 'emotional investment' scale to help partners compromise. They also touch on the importance of using 'I' statements for better communication and listening skills.
Throughout the conversation, Kelli emphasizes the normality of the ebb and flow of emotions in relationships, and provides practical tips for couples to work through common challenges and reignite their connection, both emotionally and physically.
Key Episodes Takeaways
- Relationships go through natural emotional cycles, so not feeling 'in love' all the time is normal
- Reignite passion by doing exciting new activities together and reminding yourself why you fell for your partner
- Set boundaries around social media use to prevent it from damaging your connection
- Use an 'emotional investment' scale to identify who cares more about an issue to guide compromises
- Speak using 'I' statements rather than blaming to facilitate better communication
- Take action first - the associated positive feelings and motivation will follow
- View your relationship as a team effort rather than trying to 'win' as individuals
- Take breaks from technology to reconnect with each other in the present moment
Top Episodes Quotes
- “I want you to think of it as winning the best as a couple. So if you can look at it through that framework, it will help you get out of that individual mentality.“ by Kelli Miller
- “I always say, do the action, and the feeling will come. Right? So you did the action. You're like, all right, I'm gonna do this hike. And then the feeling came. And so I think that's where we have to approach it, where the feeling might not necessarily be there, but it will after you do it, and that will be helpful to some people.“ by Kelli Miller
- “And I think we can recognize that. Oh, yeah, I forgot what I'm missing here.“ by Kelli Miller
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Episode Information
Relationship Advice
Hosted by: Chase Kosterlitz, Produced by: Sarah Kosterlitz
3/27/24
Kelli Miller shares essential advice for tackling common relationship issues. From reigniting feelings of love to navigating differences in desires and managing the impact of social media, Kelli provides practical tips to enhance your relationship. Tune in for actionable insights on compromise and understanding the ebb and flow of emotions, empowering you to strengthen your bond with your partner.
In this episode with Kelli Miller we discuss relationship advice topics that include:
- What to do if you don't feel in love with your partner anymore?
- Navigating social media and understanding if it's damaging your relationship
- What to do if you and your partner want different things in your relationship and life
- Why it's normal to not feel in love all of the time
- Acting in order to produce the emotional change you desire
- Amazing tips to help you compromise with your partner more easily
- And much more!
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