DeepSummary
The passage begins with a quote from Marcus Aurelius, stating that one cannot avoid criticism, no matter how hard one tries. People naturally want to be liked and accepted, so they often conform to societal expectations. However, Aurelius argues that this effort is ultimately fruitless, as criticism will still arise regardless of one's actions.
The passage then uses Aurelius's own life as an example, suggesting that if he had tried to conform to the expectations of his critics or sought the approval of future generations through conquest or grand deeds, his Meditations would not have been as personally meaningful and vulnerable as they are. Despite being criticized in his time and by modern academics, Aurelius remained true to himself.
The main argument is that one should not try to avoid criticism by changing oneself to fit others' expectations. Instead, one should focus on being true to one's own values and beliefs, doing what feels meaningful and right. Criticism will always exist, so it is better to earn one's own self-respect rather than seeking the approval of the masses or future generations.
Key Episodes Takeaways
- Do not try to conform to societal expectations or avoid criticism by changing yourself; instead, be true to your own values and beliefs.
- Focus on doing what feels meaningful, important, and fulfilling to you personally, rather than seeking the approval of others.
- Criticism is inevitable, no matter what you do, so it is better to earn your own self-respect than seek the praise of the masses or future generations.
- Use Marcus Aurelius's life as an example of someone who remained true to himself despite facing criticism.
- Accept that people will always find something to criticize, so do not let the fear of criticism dictate your actions.
- Prioritize your own sense of what is right over trying to fit into the expectations or "box" that others have for you.
- Seek the approval and praise of yourself, not others or the future, as that is a difficult goal to achieve.
Top Episodes Quotes
- “You might as well do what you think ought to be done. You might as well do what seems meaningful and important and fulfilling and right to you.“ by Marcus Aurelius
- “Imagine if he had tried instead to conform to their expectations, to fit more clearly in the box they wanted him to be.“ by Ryan Holiday
- “Imagine if he'd tried to win the mob's favor, or respect the future generations by conquest or dazzling deed.“ by Ryan Holiday
- “Nobody wants to be criticized. It doesn't feel good when people judge what you've done.“ by Ryan Holiday
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Episode Information
The Daily Stoic
Daily Stoic | Wondery
2/7/24
Nobody wants to be criticized. It doesn’t feel good when people judge what you’ve done. We want the right people to like us, we want all people to like us. We want to be accepted, appreciated, celebrated. So we try to be like other people, like the people that everyone likes.
Imagine if he had tried instead to conform to their expectations, to fit more clearly in the box they wanted him to be. Imagine if he’d tried to win the mob’s favor or the respect of future generations by conquest or dazzling deed. Imagine if he had written Meditations for an audience instead of from a far more personal and vulnerable place.
It doesn’t matter what you do, the criticism is always going to be there. So you might as well do what you think ought to be done. You might as well do what seems meaningful and important and fulfilling and right to you. People are going to say what they’re going to say, haters will find a way to hate. In the meantime, just be true to yourself, be true to the mission you have, fight for the respect (and praise) of yourself, not the mob, not the future.
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