DeepSummary
Dr. Susan David, a Harvard Medical School psychologist, discusses the concept of emotional agility and how to manage emotions effectively in relationships and life. She explains that emotions are neither good nor bad, but rather data points that signpost our values and needs. By showing up to difficult emotions with compassion and helping children label their feelings, parents can teach emotional regulation skills.
Dr. David stresses the importance of repairing conflicts in relationships, rather than avoiding them altogether. She advises against bottling up emotions or engaging in brooding, as both can lead to negative outcomes. Instead, she recommends moving towards values and having deeper conversations about emotions.
The episode covers various topics related to emotions, including anxiety, reactivity, guilt, and the idea of being "whelmed" - not overwhelmed or underwhelmed, but moving in the direction of one's values with a sense of growth. Dr. David provides practical tips for managing emotions in everyday situations.
Key Episodes Takeaways
- Emotions are neither good nor bad, but rather data points signaling our values and needs.
- Showing compassion towards emotions and helping children label their feelings can teach emotional regulation skills.
- Repairing conflicts through deeper conversations is more important than avoiding conflicts altogether.
- Bottling up emotions or engaging in brooding can lead to negative outcomes.
- Moving towards values and having open conversations about emotions is crucial for emotional health.
- Guilt is an important social emotion that promotes accountability and social functioning.
- Not all emotional experiences require a reaction; discernment is needed.
- Being "whelmed" means moving towards personal growth while acknowledging and addressing persistent difficult emotions.
Top Episodes Quotes
- “When we are surrounded by a lot of stress and complexity, when there's a lot going on, we often land up being in mental overload. And if you think from an evolutionary perspective, when we are in mental overload, we have what we call cognitive narrowing.“ by Susan David
- “Most fights in relationships are not soluble. And really, what I mean is the same fight will come up or different needs are going to come up and there's going to be stresses that are going to be there throughout the relationship.“ by Susan David
- “Not every. If we think of the world of emotional experience, there's a whole world of emotional experience. Not every single emotional experience deserves a reaction.“ by Susan David
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Episode Information
The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast
Lauryn Bosstick & Michael Bosstick / Dear Media
4/29/24
693: Today we're joined by Susan David. Susan David, Ph.D., is one of the world’s leading management thinkers and an award-winning Harvard Medical School psychologist. Her TED Talk on the topic of emotional agility has been seen by more than 10 million people. She sits down with us today for a deep dive into emotions, how to manage them, and how to rethink the way we see our emotions. We discuss emotional agility, reactivity, and how to use your emotions as data.
To connect with Susan David click HERE To connect with Lauryn Bosstick click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE To Watch the Show click HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential This episode is brought to you by Toups & Co Visit www.toupsandco.com and use code SKINNY for 15% off your first order. This episode is brought to you by Active Skin Repair Visit ActiveSkinRepair.com to learn more about Active Skin Repair and use code SKINNY to get 20% off your order. This episode is brought to you by Ritual Start a daily ritual that you can fe