DeepSummary
The podcast episode features insights from various experts on effective negotiation strategies, building trust and credibility, and engaging in positive conversations. Former FBI negotiator Chris Voss shares tactics like letting the other side go first, making what you want the path to what they want, and using strategic phrasing like 'How' questions instead of 'Yes/No' questions.
Former Secret Service agent Evy Poumpouras discusses techniques for gaining respect such as empathizing with the other person's perspective, being playful and positive, and allowing some autonomy. She also advises against directly accusing someone of lying and instead using language that doesn't provoke defensiveness.
Conversation expert Jefferson Fisher provides tips on building rapport through tactics like matching the other person's tone and body language, asking open-ended questions, and sharing relatable personal stories sparingly. He emphasizes being an active listener and making the other person feel heard.
Key Episodes Takeaways
- Let the other side go first in negotiations to gather intelligence on their wants and needs
- Use 'How' questions strategically instead of 'Yes/No' questions to keep the conversation open
- Align your wants as the path to fulfilling the other party's wants
- Create an open, relaxed environment to make people feel comfortable opening up
- Be playful and positive to avoid seeming aggressive or adversarial
- Empathize with the other person's perspective to build rapport
- Use strategic phrasing that avoids accusatory language when skeptical of someone
- Be an engaged, curious listener to foster a positive connection
Top Episodes Quotes
- “The nicer you are, the more movable you could be. You don't have to give up that much assertion. You don't want to be that mean.“ by Chris Voss
- “So if you want to know who you're hiring, let's say, or who you're dealing with or who you're bringing into your space, you want openness, and you want them to speak to you in an open way, freely, so you can get all the information.“ by Evy Poumpouras
- “If people feel like they're being interviewed, that they're going to bring that. So you want to get people to feel comfortable, and you want to have that openness.“ by Evy Poumpouras
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Episode Information
The School of Greatness
Lewis Howes
3/15/24