DeepSummary
The episode delves into the pervasive culture of busyness and its connection to self-worth and productivity. Glennon discusses how her worth has been tied to her ability to accomplish tasks and the discomfort she feels when things are left undone. She reflects on the need to detach her sense of okayness from the completion of a to-do list and recognize that there will always be more to do.
Amanda shares her perspective on the religion of productivity and how it has colonized our minds. She questions the idea of "earning a living" and the notion that we must be constantly busy to deserve our existence. The group explores the fear of letting go of the productivity puzzle and trusting one's own limits and feelings.
Abby reflects on the difficulty of recalibrating her self-esteem after retiring from soccer, where suffering and productivity were deeply tied to her identity. The discussion highlights the importance of finding new sources of worth beyond busyness and the need to be gentle with oneself during the process of deprogramming from the cult of productivity.
Key Episodes Takeaways
- The pervasive culture of busyness is tied to notions of self-worth and productivity, where constant doing and task completion are seen as measures of one's value.
- There is a fear of letting go of the 'productivity puzzle' and trusting one's own limits and feelings, as it requires redefining what makes one 'okay' beyond external measures.
- Detaching one's sense of okayness from task completion and embracing moments of rest and presence can be deeply uncomfortable, as it challenges ingrained beliefs about productivity and worthiness.
- Finding new sources of worth beyond busyness and being gentle with oneself during the process of deprogramming from the cult of productivity are essential.
- Phrases like 'earning a living' and the notion of the 'deserving poor' reflect the societal belief that one must be constantly productive to deserve existence.
- Questioning the assumption that busyness and suffering are necessary for acceptance and worth is a crucial step in breaking free from the cycle of constant doing.
- Pets and loved ones can serve as reminders that our worth extends beyond productivity, as they love us more when we are present and not consumed by busyness.
- Recalibrating self-esteem and identity after leaving behind a productivity-driven mindset can be challenging, but embracing one's own divinity and trusting inner limits is ultimately liberating.
Top Episodes Quotes
- “I have gotten to just say, what is enough at some point, because I'm living in a fiction, as if I do these 14 things every night. Eventually, one night, there won't be those.“ by Glennon Doyle
- “Earn a living.“ by Glennon Doyle
- “You have to signal to us that you are suffering for us to accept you. And the signal of that is busyness is busyness.“ by Glennon Doyle
- “I am earning my living.“ by Amanda Doyle
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Episode Information
We Can Do Hard Things
Glennon Doyle and Audacy
4/30/24
304. Break Up with Busyness & Let Go of Your To-Do List
Amanda delves into her relationship with Busyness and how she’s working through it. We’ll touch on topics such as the pervasive culture of busyness, productivity as a measure of self-worth, and the struggle to define personal boundaries and prioritize genuine happiness (after some hilarious banter between Glennon and Abby about how to deal with “disgusting” things in a relationship).
Discover:
-Why Busyness is such a pervasive and oppressive cult for so many of us;
-How to decouple your self-esteem and identity from your productivity;
-The actionable tactic Amanda is using in her break up with Busyness; and
-How your pets prove that the religion of busyness is a lie.
Check out these episodes, too:
281. How Amanda Finally Calmed Her Brain & Her Letter from Love with Liz Gilbert
261. How to Stretch Time with Jenny Odell
139. No More Grind: How to Finally Rest with Tricia Hersey
93. BURNOUT: Do You Feel Half Alive? with Emily and Amelia Nagoski
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